joyce.grenfell


Newsgroups: uk.politics,uk.media,uk.misc,uk.net,demon.local,alt.politics.british
Path: frink!mpk
From: mpk@frink.demon.co.uk (Mike Knell)
Subject: Re: David Shaw MP: No 10 Downing Street to test Internet connection
Organization: UK Centre for Lemur Fandom
Message-ID: <1995Jan14.160303.4090@frink.demon.co.uk>
References: <789938977snz@dlshaw.demon.co.uk> <789959319snz@corixia.demon.co.uk>
Date: Sat, 14 Jan 1995 16:03:03 GMT

Hello again, children! Well, what are we going to do today? We're going to play
at Usenet today! Now _won't_ that be fun? 

In article <789959319snz@corixia.demon.co.uk>,
Richard Ashton  wrote:
>

Richard.. Richard, _do_ put that
keyboard down. No, don't hit Alice with it. That's not nice. Now, let's hear
_all_ about Usenet, shall we? It _will_ be lots of fun. Well, it's something
grown-ups do with computers. In the old days, only especially clever grown-ups
were allowed to play with Usenet, because they needed specially big computers
at work which they could play Usenet with... Richard? Richard, _don't_ do that.
Just try and cough it back up now.. That's better. Eating floppy disks is bad
for you, Richard. And no, don't try and stick that microprocessor up Susan's
nose. Just put it down now, there's a good boy.

Now, where was I? Oh yes, in the old days only clever grown-ups could play
Usenet, but now, thanks to those nice people at Demon, all sorts of grown-ups
can play with Usenet, even ones who only have a little PC of their own at
home, and the ones who aren't very clever. Some of our Members of Parliament
have access too now, to assist them in communicating with normal people like
you and I, but also to read alt.sex.spanking and other parliamentary
newsgroups. No, that was just my little joke, Mark. Don't tell your Mummy to
sue me for libel, that wouldn't be nice.

>I think all  MP's are a wankers

Now, Richard, that's not very nice, is it? And that's a _very_ nasty word.
Have you been reading alt.flame while I've been out of the room again? Now,
let's get back to learning about Usenet, shall we? Good. Now, there are lots
of different newsgroups, all about fun things like games, toys, and stories!
Isn't that fun? There are newsgroups about bestiality and cannabis as well,
but I'm not going to show those to you today -- maybe if you ask your Mummy
and Daddy nicely they'll show you. 

>}David L Shaw MP  |*| The Friendly MP |*| Why use the Channel Tunnel when
>}(Dover and Deal) |*| on the Internet |*| you can enjoy Dover's Ferries?
>
>Why post in demon.local, just to fucking prove it?

Richard! Now that's not a nice thing to say to the gentleman. Go and stand
in the corner. No, not there. That's not the corner, that's the middle of
the room. And stop pulling Sally's pigtails. No, don't strangle her with
that Ethernet drop either. What? Now that's a bad thing to say, young man!
Go and stand in the corner and when your mummy comes later I'll be having
words with her. There'll be no alt.sex.stories for you for the next few
weeks. Richard, _don't_ do that...

(with apologies to Joyce Grenfell, flames to /dev/null)

                                                              -- mpK.
							      

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